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A Letter from the Heart to Ally


December 18, 2006

Dear Ally,

If I could talk with you one more time, I would say, "Please don't leave.  I love you so much.  I know that it's selfish of me to want you to stay.  I know that your pain is unbearable and you want to make it stop.  It's just that if you leave than I will feel your pain every time that I think of you for the rest of my life.  Do you want to do that to me?  When I look at you, I see your beautiful sweet face - the face that I have loved ever since you were a baby. I can't bear to lose you." 

If I could talk with you one more time, I would say, "Please don't leave yet.  It's not your time, you're too young and you have so many wonderful things to look forward to in your life.  I know that you have had some problems recently and that you want to get married and have children one day.  You think that this can never happen to you.  You are so young, tomorrow is a brand new day, and you will meet other people in your life and good things will come to you.  Life is full of ups and downs but your life will be good again, it will, it really will.  Trust me ..."

If I could talk with you one more time, I would say, "Please don't leave yet.  Please stay and try to make it.  I know that this world can be difficult and I know that you are sensitive and tender.  You feel so strongly and it hurts so bad when things go wrong and people let you down.  Your thoughts right now are impulsive and you're not thinking clearly.  Every day there are new discoveries to help people with depression.  I know that you can get the help that you need to make you feel better.  You have a family and so many friends that care about you and want to help you.  All of us will bleed tears forever if you leave.  Please, Ally, don't go."   

Love you forever,

Mom